Rachel at The-F-Word.org mentions the movie Disfigured, a movie about women and weight (on DVD July 29). Disfigured is the story of “an unexpected friendship between two women - one obese, the other anorexic.” (If you are interested in whatever happened to the winner of the first season of the biggest loser, definitely read Rachel’s article.)

The movie materials describe this friendship as “unexpected”–the perception being, as the fat girl says in the film, “I’m your worst nightmare.” In the past, I’ve thought it myself: even though thin and normal-weight women who suffer from eating disorder, well, suffer, at least they’re not fat. I never held bad feelings for thin women, but I may have minimized their pain.

Thus, the movie begins with Darcy (the woman with anorexia), seeking to join a Fat Acceptance group because she feels that she is fat. And she is refused admittance to the group.

Coming from the point of view of a woman who has always been larger than the norm, there have been times that I have said (in jest), “If I didn’t have low-blood sugar I would have been an anorexic,” as though anorexia is a condition to be desired, rather than a debilitating disease. Later in the film, Lydia (the larger woman) asks Darcy for “anorexia lessons.”

Thanks to my exposure to the stories of women with eating disorders (mostly through the blogosphere) I’ve learned that language that minimizes anorexia or bulumia is as insensitive (and offensive) as “No fat chicks.” And the more you compare the experiences of women around issues of the body, the clearer it becomes–we are all the same under the skin.

I look forward to seeing how this movie treats these and other issues relating to women and weight.

Have hot pink Post-Its, will travel. (See earlier article: Body activism works to reduce the “thin ideal”)

I’m leaving “You are beautiful” notes on mirrors everywhere.

What have you been doing in the name of body activism? I’d love to hear about it.

I am always trying to challenge myself regarding my own comfort level with my body (thus my foray into a women’s nude yoga class–a story for another time). So, at the end of swimsuit season last year, I decided to buy myself a cute, skirted bikini.

I’ve wanted to wear a two-piece swimsuit since, well, forever, but I’ve never had the nerve. However, when I saw a version of this cute INC International Concepts suit in a size 16, I took it to the dressing room to try it on.

Even under the cold flourescent glare of the fitting room lights, the suit looked cute. I liked the cut and the skirt was just the right amount of flouncy. I took it on and off several times, and each time I liked it on more than the last. The thought crossed my mind: this suit is meant for tall, lean, size-16s, not 5′5″ size-16s. But, I let that thought go, and bought my first bikini.

I took the suit for a test drive at the complex pool last season when I figured that no one would be around. I was pleased.

But the real test came this weekend, at our homeowner’s association pool party. Did I have the nerve to wear my (not so)-itsy-witsy-teeny-weeny black-and-white skirtini in front of all my neighbors? Could I sit in a lounge chair by the pool with 30 other people?

I rarely feel self-conscious around clothes and public settings. If I like how I look, that’s good enough for me. So, I screwed up my courage, put on my cute sarong cover-up, and headed to the pool. My reaction when I arrived really surprised me: I couldn’t bring myself to remove my cover-up.

I had the following dialogue with myself:

Just take off your cover-up and get in the pool.

But, I don’t know if I’m ready to be known by my neighbors as “the fat girl in the bikini?”

Didn’t you make peace with the whole “fat girl” thing a long time ago?

Yes, but, remember what they say on “What Not To Wear”: You may not care what you look like, but the rest of us have to look at you.

Anyone offended by you in a bikini by the pool can avert their eyes. Just take off the sarong and do it.

So, I did. And no one screamed out in disgust or ran in horror.

And how did I look in my bikini?

Curvy me in a bikini, do I dare? I did, and I do.

I was watching The View today (ouch!) and the topic of Princess Beatrice and her size “normal” body came up (doesn’t Beatrice look great here!). Everyone on the panel lamented the pitiful state of media images and declared that, as women, we need to quit buying into the whole thing. Then Whoopi quoted a study in which 56% of women reported that they would rather have cancer than be fat. Joy Behar kept commenting on how “sick” that attitude is and how warped our cultural notions are around fat and body image. Yet, in the same breath, she mentioned that she was going to an acupuncturist that same afternoon to try to control her appetite, because if she didn’t quite eating she could get “bigger and bigger.” To her credit, she admitted:

Just because I criticize doesn’t mean I’m not a victim and a perpetrator.

This perfectly illustrates the results of the study in my previous post: even though women are better educated than ever on the myth of the thin ideal, we buy into the message even more so than a decade ago.

You can see the segment in it’s entirety at http://abc.go.com/daytime/theview/index, Hot Topics 5/7 - Healthy Women. (Be patient: the quote above occurs at the end of Part 3.)

If you watch this segment, or if you’ve already seen it, I would love your take on Whoopi’s statement at the end of the topic on body image and dieting. Whoopi is/was the spokesperson for a weight loss program, and her current diet is a regular feature on The View. What did she mean when she said that she didn’t care about her weight until someone talked to her about getting paid? Is she saying that the only reason she diets is for money? I didn’t get it.

I wasn’t surprised when I saw yet another article on the negative impact of media depiction of ultra-thin actresses and models on body image; however,  the findings of  researcher Shelly Grabe and psychology professor Janet Hyde describe a sweeping analysis of 77 previous studies involving more than 15,000 subjects that reveals:

“We’ve demonstrated that it doesn’t matter what the exposure is, whether it’s general TV watching in the evening, or magazines, or ads showing on a computer,” says Grabe. “If the image is appearance-focused and sends a clear message about a woman’s body as an object, then it’s going to affect women.”

The effect also appears to be growing. The researchers’ analysis reveals that, on average, studies conducted in the 2000s show a larger influence of the media on women’s body image than do those from the 1990s, says Grabe.

“This suggests that despite all our efforts to teach women and girls to be savvy about the media and have healthy body practices, the media’s effect on how much they internalize the thin ideal is getting stronger,” she says.

In the past several years, I’ve been excited to see media consumers becoming more educated as  to how to deconstruct media messages and media images.  Dove has deconstructed images of beauty–Tyra Banks has pulled the curtain back on modeling.  Sadly, even though we know that the images that we see are not only unrealistic, but that often they are unreal, we are still impacted.

Or, let me change the “we” to “I”–I know that these images are plastic and manipulated, but I still feel the gut punch of the current standard of beauty.  Sometimes I find the mental and emotional fight to be exhausting.  But, I refuse to give up.  I want to love my body, to embrace my beauty, to be grateful to my body for allowing me to enjoy the fullness of life.

[Quote Source: University of Wisconsin-Madison (2008, May 12). Sweeping Analysis Of Research Reinforces Strong Media Influence On Women's Body Image. ScienceDaily. Retrieved May 25, 2008, from http://www.sciencedaily.com­ /releases/2008/05/080512163828.htm]

It is no surprise to most of us to read that body loathing has become the norm for American women, with the majority of women in the U.S. expressing dissatisfaction with some part of their body; however, Denise E. Laframboise, a clinical psychologist and assistant professor at the University of Hartford, says that at least half of all American men are now experiencing body image dissatisfaction.

The Hartford Courant.com features an interview with Laframboise on therapies for treating body image dissatisfaction. This is an informative interview on body image; however, I was struck by the 50% number for men and negative body image. I find that when I speak to groups of both women and men, there is always at least one man that expresses concern over his body image. Laframboise associates this trend with college-age men; however, I’m hearing men of all ages who are suffering with body concerns.

Here’s a quote from the article:

There is lots of evidence that body-image distress in men is increasing. … There’s a real spike in college-age men. For some reason, those younger men are just getting bombarded by media images that are really unrealistic.

In research, we get about half of the men (who are distressed with their bodies) expressing the same things as women: I need to lose weight. The other half of men are very different; they want to gain weight, bulk up, become more muscular.

I hear the “I need to lose weight” from guys a lot. What are you hearing?

And to the guys out there: how are you dealing with the pressures around body image?

Congratulations to Whitney on becoming America’s Next Top Model (I wish I had a picture of her in that pink Versace dress from the finale). My favorite line from tonight’s episode comes courtesy of the make-up artist preparing Whitney for the final runway show:

You’re the first juicy booty to make it to the runway.

All season long, Whitney has been referred to as the “plus-size” model. Tonight Tyra corrected that term and said that she was the “full-figured” model. Whitney has curves, but she’s neither plus-sized or full-figured. Still, I’m glad a woman with a more ”average” sized body will have a chance to be in the media as a representation of beauty. I’ll be curious to see what kind of media coverage she receives as the first full-figured winner.

Here is an art project that makes my heart sing:

The Human Mozaïk chose to sing the praises of curves and of round bodies by inviting women from across Canada aged from 18 to 50 years old to lend their forms to semi-nude photography and to unique artistic creations inspired by their curves. Each model’s curves and roundures were interpreted by different artists according to their respective styles, techniques and medium.

The Mozaïk~Curves project is also a collection of testimonies, poems and affirmations. The texts are written by the models, courageous women who become natural, artistic, proud, beautiful and intelligent. This is an original, colourful and inspiring project shedding a positive look on women’s curves and roundness!

http://www.artmozaik.com/Curves.html

I love the beautiful, sensual, artistry of the project. It is fascinating to see how various artists interpret the same photograph. The artists of the Human Mozaïk do a fabulous job of demonstrating the beauty of curves no matter the size or shape. I love seeing this diversity of female bodies portrayed side-by-side. Not only do these images move me, they make me want to see myself portrayed in such an inspiring and empowering way.

See the website for information on ordering the book (US $45) . I’m definitely getting one.

Is 4-foot 9-inch 10-year-old girl who weighs 84 lbs fat? According to Nintendo’s Wii Fit game, she is. Wii Fit’s “fat” or “fit” is based solely on BMI. This young girl is active–she swims and dances–yet she is declared not just “unfit” but “fat” by a video game.  The article below reports that the girl in question is “devastated” to be labeled “overweight.”  And rightly so. This is such a delicate age for body image issues–and being called fat by your video game is just the kind of thing that triggers serious body image issues.

This is just one more example where BMI does not accurately represent health and fitness.

(Source:Pocket-lint)

Could Wii Fit create bad body image?

Concerns after game labels young girl “fat”

NEWS: 7 May 2008 15:32 GMT by Verity Burns

Parents on an online forum have expressed concerns over Nintendo’s Wii Fit creating a bad body image, particularly with young girls.

The controversy was sparked after a user complained that the game labelled her relative overweight.

“My [relative] came round this weekend and we let her play on our Wii Fit”, she wrote. “We have all laughed and joked about being told that we’re fat and need to lose weight but I was gobsmacked when it told her that she is overweight.”

According to the poster, the girl in question is a healthy 4-foot 9-inch 10-year-old who swims, dances and weighs only six stone [US 84 lbs]. “She is solidly built”, the poster adds, “but not fat”.

Apparently the young girl was “devastated” to be labelled as overweight.

The poster added: “I know it is just a game but seriously we already have to worry about young girls starving themselves to look like the magazine models and now we have a game that tells them they’re fat”.

Forum users have replied with varying responses, many angrily and backing the poster’s decision to write and complain to Nintendo (they are yet to reply).

However as one forum member pointed out, Wii Fit merely utilises the internationally-used BMI scale to calculate whether a user is overweight or not, and so Nintendo cannot be held responsible for the outcome.

BMI is considered by some to not be the best way to measure weight as it does not take into account frame or muscle.

I love fashion, but I hate fashion magazines. Studies have shown that the pictures in fashion magazines have a more negative impact on our body image and self-esteem than any other images. That being said, I do read some fashion mags (Figure Magazine just isn’t broad enough for me). One mainstream magazine that I subscribe to is Glamour. I noticed about a year ago that Glamour was making an effort to be more inclusive (in comparison with others) in portraying plus sizes. What that translates to is two or three mentions of plus-size clothes. Their “Dress Your Body” segment always includes a plus size model, and this month they address fashionable plus-size labels. It’s not enough, but it’s something.

That being said, I read one of the most amazing tributes to the female form in this month’s (June 2008) issue of Glamour, in the article “What Keeps a Guy Hooked on You For Life.” This is one of those male-perspective articles on what men love about their women. This article is not posted at Glamour.com, so I’m going to post the highlights of one man’s tribute to his wife’s hips–From: “Her Hips,” by Will Robinson, 29, in love for 15 years.

… But if you asked me what I couldn’t live without, what I need above all else, what I’ve worshipped since the very first day we met, I would tell you with a smile: her hips.

Round and sensual, those hips are what transform my wife from simply beautiful to incredibly sexy. They take a hard turn from her waist and then softly curve down to her thighs, a perfect combination of forcefulness and femininity….

… I wish I could convince her that though I’ll love her forever no matter what shape she’s in, having those extra-voluptuous hips to grab onto makes life together all the sweeter.

That may be the hottest thing I’ve ever read. Female hips as the “perfect combination of forcefulness and femininity”–that is a powerful testimony.

I’ve been so busy that I almost missed it–Tuesday [not Monday, as previously stated] is International No Diet Day. The goal of the day is to encourage “women of all ages to collectively reflect on the importance of diets and on our society’s obsession with thinness.” No Diet Day was established in 1992 by Mary Evans Young, the director of the British anti-diet campaign “Diet Breakers.”

A great way to celebrate No Diet Day is to check out the fascinating blog, NotDieting.com. The blog is one young woman’s social experiment on what it means to NOT diet for a year. Her take of the pressures of body image and eating are insightful and interesting. She is not advocating unhealthly eating, in fact, she is pursuing healthier eating habits by purposely not dieting (and to me that says it all). Here’s a little of her story:

Some of you may be thinking: who is this crazy nut that is not dieting for one year?

Well, this crazy nut is 28 years old and has spent more than half her life on a diet. In fact, this is the first time since I was 12 that I have been NotDieting for any period of time. Since the age of 12 my life can be placed in two categories, dieting and overeating after the diet.

Strangely, I have never been overweight. I remember reading my mom’s Vogue magazines when I was 7 or 8 years old and hoping, praying that one day I would be as beautiful as the models in the picture. I thought they must have perfect lives, filled with happiness and love. My own mom always told me I was beautiful and gave me lots of love, but the glossy pages were too seductive.

I don’t blame the magazines themselves. I’m sure there are plenty of young girls who have glanced through the very same pages I once did without feeling completely inadequate. Aren’t there? Anyway, I often wonder what would happen if I hadn’t been exposed to media that glorifies physical perfection. Well, my skin would be pretty pasty because I’d have to live underground in order for that to happen! Today it is more prevalent then ever and equally dangerous.

I, too, like to live dangerously and I suspect that if you have made it to the bottom of this article, so do you. Let’s blow this diet pop stand together and have a life filled with happiness and love, our way.

And for anyone who is/has been a life-long dieter, her article on eating cereal is priceless.

So, on this International No Diet Day, I wish the hostess of NotDieting.com much success in No Diet Year.

Saifa said most girls, and some of the boys, in her school worried about their appearance, but she thought inner beauty was more important.

BBC News has a website aimed at news for kids where they chat about the news. They have a series of articles aimed at children who worry about body image. What I really love is the video by their “worry” expert, “Agony Uncle” Aaron Balick. His message aimed at kids is spot on for adults as well. Here’s the text of the video:

So why are we so obsessed by the way we look?

It’s for two major reasons. The first is that we want to make a good first impression.

And the second reason is that we compare ourselves with people in the media and magazines.

These people are airbrushed, work hard with personal trainers and we can’t compare ourselves to them.

Why have we become like this, trying to be thinner and prettier and so on?

Good question. The culture we live in is image based. Many things are sold on image. Big images on billboards get our attention, and it’s the same with TV and movies.

And it’s about what people think is the most important thing getting mixed up. We see images everywhere, and we’re fooled into thinking ‘that’s about me’.

But it’s not just about looks. It’s about wider things like the way you think, having good ideas, being artistic or enjoying sport.

If you get upset, how do you get over it?

This is one of the things that’s easy to say and tough to do.

When you look at magazines, there’s sometimes a voice in your in head that talks to you in a nasty way.

The trick is to become aware of that voice and tell it to stop and replace it with more positive things, for example, what makes you happy and what makes people like you?

Everyone says it’s the inside that counts. Is that unrealistic?

My advice is to focus on what you want to appear good at, and not focus on first impressions.

Find things that make you feel good about yourself and develop them, then image will matter less.

Should we blame celebs?

They are not to blame. A lot of models and celebrities are caught up in themselves. It’s important to remember they might feel as bad about themselves as we do.

What if you get the mickey taken out of you at school? How can you shake it off?

You need to look at all the people around you. Everyone is slightly different.

One of the important things is not to make it so personal.

Look in a mirror, but also look at everyone else - I’m wearing glasses and am bald - lots of people out there are like this.

The second thing is to be a leader not a follower - who made them the fashion god or body god?

If they don’t like it, well that’s their business.

Congratulations to Tiffabee on the one month birthday of her great blog, Eat A Cheeseburger (www.tiffabee.wordpress.com). She is all about de-constructing the myths behind the thin ideal and challenging our society’s notions of beauty as it relates to our bodies. Not only is she keeping an eye on the media, she has created her “Cheeseburger Rules,” to help us to stay sane in a thin-obsessed world.

Here are The Cheeseburger Rules (check The Complete Set of Cheeseburger Rules for the details):

There are many beautiful, sexy plus-size women; however, if we never see ourselves reflected in the mirror of media as sexy, we begin to feel invisible. This is the ongoing dilema for the curvy girl: to be at once a visual spectacle, told she’s “too large” thus “too visible,” yet to simultaneously feel invisible in the domain of beauty and sexuality.

The F-Word.org has a fabulous, in-depth interview with grad student/photographer Kristin “Lou” Herout who replicated high-fashion magazine ads with “real” women as part of a study of the way the image of the ideal woman has changed in modern times–”he women progressively changed from large boned, round-faced, beautiful women to bone-protruding, thin women.

I’ve included an excerpt here regarding the treatment of plus-size women in media and advertising that for many years caused me much distress–the portrayal of larger women as anything BUT sexy:

It is extremely rare for any plus-size woman to be seen as a sexual being unless it is being portrayed as a joke. As stated in my paper, there is a “Wingman Training Manual” that is published by Maxim magazine that tells men how to keep their buddies from hooking up with a big woman when he gets drunk.

In my scholarly paper, I discuss the phenomenon of the plus-size bride; the bridal industry must represent plus-size women in some ads because the plus-size woman accounts for a large chunk of the market, but in an ad, the plus-size woman is treated very differently than her thinner counterpart. She is given a simpler dress, simpler background and loses the sexy mysteriousness that is common in haute-couture models. The plus-size girl wears a huge toothy smile, therefore there are different expectations for a woman of larger stature compared to a thinner model.

I think that campaigns such as the “Dove True Beauty Campaign” are commonly more hurtful than helpful. If this campaign, women are shown as being proud of who they are, great! But these women are average-size women; plus-size women are left out in the cold in this campaign. Also, these women still aren’t given the same attention as thin women: they aren’t shown as really sexy, they’re shown as being confident, despite their curves. They should be presented as being beautiful, sexy and proud, just as thin models are. Otherwise we are still making an exception for average-size women, instead of making them the norm.

I met a lovely woman, Marguerite, who made the statement in this post’s title: “My friends don’t like me when I’m 20 lbs heavier.” She is petite in frame and size, so, at 20 lbs thinner I think she’d probably disappear. But, she was at Loehman’s (where everyone strips down together to try on clothes), shopping with some college friends, and she commented that she could feel their disdain for her weight. She added, “They don’t like my glasses either (she wears stunning black frames), they think I should wear contacts.”

My questions:

1. What is it to her friends if she is 20 lbs, 40 lbs, 100 lbs heavier than in college? Isn’t she the same dear friend of their youth?
2. Why do we as women do this to one another? We are so vicious toward other women as regards appearance.

Hang in there, Marguerite! And keep the glasses–they’re awesome.