Thanks to Mariellen/vesta44 at Big Fat Delicious for her post on the Blog Talk Radio show The Overweight Date - Fat or Phat?

The cultural and racial perceptions of body image and weight, and how such perceptions translate into romantic desirability for single men and women will be the focus of Sucka Free Dating – The Smart Relationship Talk Show (http://blogtalkradio.com/askheartbeat) with host Deborrah Cooper on Wednesday, April 16th, 2008 at 8:00 p.m. Pacific. The live, call-in show will feature two guests active in the body acceptance movement; Dr. Lisa A. Breisch is a Licensed Clinical Psychotherapist who specializes in working with plus-size individuals. Breisch also owns Club Round, which sponsors activities such as speed dating nights for plus-size teens and adults and their admirers. Laurie Toby Edison is an internationally exhibited photographer “Women En Large: Images of Fat Nudes” and body image activist, who blogs at Body Impolitic (http://www.laurietobyedison.com).

Dr. Lisa A. Breisch and Laurie Toby Edison were phenomenal in their discussions on issues of weight and beauty. Of course, in the midst of all of this positivity, some guy just had to call in and play the “health” card–’Men don’t want to date fat women because we’re worried they’re unhealthy and will not be able to bear us unhealthy children.’ [Oh, please, the health of your future babies I'm sure is the foremost consideration in your mind when you offer to buy a girl a drink. She's got to present you with her cholesterol and BP before you f*%# her.] Once again, you can’t even hint at anything positive about “fat” without someone feeling compelled to point out that our cultural discrimination against fat people is because they’re unhealthy.

I was already a fan of Edison’s work, but I was also very impressed with the message and demeanor of Dr. Breisch. When she said that the motto of her size acceptance group, Club Round, is: Every Body is a Good Body - No Matter the Shape, Size, or Weight. I just wanted to cheer. She made me smile all day.

I love Edison’s book “Women En Large: Images of Fat Nudes,” but I had somehow missed one important story relevant to the creation of the project. She told of a respected male colleague who made the comment that he would never visit a nudist colony for fear of seeing ‘a 300-lb woman with an appendectomy scar.’ Even though I’ve been thinking/researching/writing about body image for years, I never made the connection that there is a fear of large naked female bodies (a disdain for, yes, but fear…). Edison determined that if culturally we could move past this fear and see large female nudes as beautiful, then we could embrace the greater beauty of all. This is why I love that book. She has a great blog that is worth checking out as well.

Victoria, Australia has created a “Voluntary Media Code of Conduct” through its Department of Planning and Community Development Office of Youth.  The Media Code of Conduct was released in July 2007, but I’m only hearing about it now (Aussie state moves to stamp out unrealistic body imagery, TV3 News).

The mission of the Code of Conduct:

The Code is designed to encourage the fashion, media and advertising industries to place greater emphasis on diversity, positive body images and a focus on health rather than body shape.

The Code presents four key recommendations (complete report here):

Altered and Enhanced Images
The use of unachievable and unrealistic digitally manipulated images of people in the media is discouraged. If such alteration has occurred, digitally altered images should be disclosed and accompanied by a ‘tag’ stating that “this image has been digitally altered” to help young people make a balanced appraisal.

Diversity in Shapes
Consideration should be given to the inclusion of a variety of body shapes, to provide fair representation in both editorial and advertising images.

Fair Placement
Consideration should be given to the editorial context in which diet, exercise or cosmetic surgery advertising is placed.

Modeling Health
Glamorisation of severely underweight models or celebrities is potentially dangerous; effort should be made to depict people of healthy weight and size.

Unlike the French proposal (to ban glamorization of  thinness), the code is strictly voluntary and provides no penalties for failure to conform to the rules.

I find these recommendations much more in line with my own philosophy, particularly the goal:”to place greater emphasis on diversity, positive body images and a focus on health rather than body shape.”

I also think that it’s a great idea to “tag” altered images as “digitally altered” (or perhaps “objects may be fatter/wrinkly-er/shorter/older than they appear”).  Even knowing that an image is altered doesn’t change its power to influence; however, the reminder of the plastic nature of the image is something.

Related to this issue, The Australian Association of National Advertisers (AANA) announced changes to the Advertising to Children Code, so as to ban the “sexualization” of children ages 14 and younger.

In the post about Chloe Marshall (the size-16 British beauty contestant), I touched on the notion that positive articles/images about women who are anything other than stick thin are often accused of “glamorizing obesity.” I exclaimed:

One kind word about loving even a “normal” body and that’s glamorizing? Then what do you call the media treatment of thinness? Idolizing thinness? Deifying thinness? Canonizing thinness? I don’t think we have a word in our vocabulary.

Apparently someone in France heard me.

French lawmakers try to outlaw skinny propaganda

By DEVORAH LAUTER

PARIS (AP) — In image-conscious France, it may soon be a crime to glamorize the ultra-thin. A new French bill cracks down on Web sites that advise anorexics on how to starve — and could be used to hit fashion industry heavyweights, too.

The groundbreaking bill, adopted Tuesday by Parliament’s lower house, recommends fines of up to $71,000 and three-year prison sentences for offenders who encourage “extreme thinness.” It goes to the Senate in the coming weeks… (Click here for the rest of the article).

According to the article, the fashion industry is not the only target of this legislation. The law is also aimed at pro-anorexia websites that teach readers how to become anorexic.

While I agree with the intention behind this legislation, I really have problems with this approach:

1. Who decides what “too thin” is? How is this decision made? It is just as unfair to penalize the naturally thin, or even “underweight,” model as it is to penalize the naturally larger, or even “overweight,” model.
2. If depictions of underweight bodies are outlawed, how quickly will depictions of overweight bodies be outlawed?
3. No way is this really going to happen anyway. Even if French government “outlaws” ultra-skinny in France, how do they control the images and ideas generated beyond their national boundaries?

The Curvy Life advocates size inclusion and body acceptance, no matter the size. Further, I believe that health and fitness should be the goal, not the attainment of any particular weight or size. Sedentary lifestyle and poor diet harm our bodies. It is a myth that somehow an observer can look at a person’s outward appearance and judge that person’s health, or lack thereof (this would render most medical testing unnecessary).

Banning one type of image or another is not the answer. Allowing for a diversity of images and a broad definition of beauty is a better solution.

And, while I shouldn’t be amazed by this consequence of the discussion, I am: in places where I have read general comments about this article, the responses have been full of fat loathing (See the comments at ajc.com for an example). So, somehow, fat is always the villain, no matter how body image is discussed.

Finally, I’ve got to include a link to Matthew Krell’s article Fat-Bottomed Girls, Make the World Go Round at StreetProphets.com. He provides some nice commentary on French attitudes toward free speech, but you’ve got to appreciate his shout out to the curvy girls. (As for the video in the post, I can’t decide if I’m amused or just disturbed.)

Sophia Dolls - www.SophiaDolls.com

I admit it - I loved Barbie. I received my first “Barbie” (a “Skipper” in fact) when I was 6 years old (a gift from my aunt). Devastated when our family dog carried her off for a few weeks, I was delighted when he dragged her dirty, chewed, gnarled plastic body home again. I just washed her off and kept playing.

I quickly graduated to real Barbies (and Kens), and from there every penny of my allowance went to Barbie clothes, the Barbie Dream Home, The Barbie Corvette, and even the Barbie camper (epiphany: I don’t know if Barbie affected my sense of body image, but she clearly set me up to have expensive taste). By the time I was 11 years old, I thought that I was “too old to be playing with dolls” (alas, I hit adolescence just before the action figure movement hit–now, young and old, male and female can play with dolls). I particularly enjoyed dressing my Barbies to the nines and enacting elaborate adventures.

So, I am quite delighted by the prospect of playing with Sophia Dolls (www.SophiaDolls.com), Barbie-style dolls with more realistic body proportions (from sizes 4 to 16) modeled after ancient Greek goddesses. Not only do the dolls represent real female bodies, each doll is connected to an empowering personality type (based on psychology and mythology). Thus, instead of “Cheerleader Barbie” (not that there’s anything wrong with that) you get “Goddess Athena-Teacher of Leadership.” (See the entire collection by clicking here.) The dolls are designed for both children and adults.

To help you choose your doll(s), SophiaDolls.com provides a “Sophia Woman Goddess Quiz” so that you can match your personality to the right goddess. My Goddess Style is Aphrodite - Creative Woman. Among her qualities: Comfortable in her body no matter what her size, shape or color. Right on, Aphrodite! I can imagine that Aphrodite could have far more exciting adventures than Malibu Barbie (though Barbie still has a better wardrobe).

Only 3 dolls in the collection are available currently, but the rest are on the way. They’re not cheap at $99.00 each, but each doll is a limited edition (only 1200 dolls each).

If nothing else, check out the Goddess Quiz. I’d like to hear: What’s your Goddess Style?

In a previous post I mentioned Chloe Marshall, a size-16 contestant in the Miss England pageant. Of course, it was bound to happen–London’s Daily Mail (a tabloid-style newspaper) criticized Chloe as “fat, lazy and a poster girl for ill health.” (Click here for a link to the ABC News article Backlash Against Big Beauty Queen.)

OK, that’s to be expected. Of course, the Daily Mail doesn’t rail against Kate Moss as being the ”poster girl for ill health” as an extremely underweight drug abuser. But, again, anytime a woman who is even slightly larger than the acceptable media standard makes any effort at all to publicly claim her beauty, she’s attacked for promoting an unhealthy lifestyle (all of this ignoring the damaging effects to the body of yo-yo dieting and the stress associated with low self-esteem, among others).

But this is the bit that galls me. One female reader, who described herself as 5″ 8′ tall, size 10, who struggles to maintain her weight by running 5K each day and avoiding junk food, wrote in support of the vicious attack on Chloe by saying:

“It makes me mad when people like Chloe are allowed to glamorize obesity, and even worse, make it look like a mentally and physically healthier alternative to watching your weight.”

What gets me about this is two things:

1. “Glamorize obesity?” Really? Come on, now. This always seems to be the charge against any positive media coverage of size acceptance. One kind word about loving even a “normal” body and that’s glamorizing? Then what the hell do you call the media treatment of thinness? Idolizing thinness? Deifying thinness? Canonizing thinness? I don’t think we have a word in our vocabulary.
2. We, the average women of the world, we support, and in fact, enforce, the hatred against ourselves. I feel sorry for this woman–no doubt, she lives under constant pressure to maintain her weight. And that, is sheer torture.

So, I conclude with: Kudos, Chloe. Hang in there, you gorgeous girl.

I have always loved April. My birthday is at the end of the month, Spring is in full swing–I like to think of April as my New Year, thus making me the perfect April Fool.

So, I’d like to thank Harriet Olivia over at Too Fat For Fashion (one of our favorite blogs) for the link to the article in Sunday’s The Independent on the size acceptance movement in the UK (Gotta love the title: We’re here. We’re fat. Get used to it.). There are so many wonderful curvy girls there doing wonderful curvy things–here are a few from the article:

Chloe Marshall, a size-16 Miss England contestant (How gorgeous is she?)

Plus, The Real Girl Band: a plus-size girl group with a new single out

Just As Beautiful: web-based plus-size magazine

Songstress Adele (pictured above): winner of the first ever Critic’s Choice Award at this year’s Brit Awards

Kate Dillon: the new face of Marina Rinaldi and my all-time favorite plus-size model

And, not mentioned, Beth Ditto with Mika on The Brit Awards.

I’ll have more details on each of these as the month progresses.

Here’s to kicking April off with a bang!

Oh, Gabriel Olds, where art thou? Gabriel has a great article in the March 2008 issue of Glamour Magazine. He writes:

But as much as we lust after images of hyper-real beauty in the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue or even in the apartments or cubicles next door, we don’t quite know how to react when those unreal bodies actually belong to the woman in our lives.

Gabriel found it very difficult to maintain relationships with women who had had plastic surgery. His reasons why and his final conclusions are quite interesting.

The article is available online by clicking here.

I love books and I’m always on the look out for new and/or interesting books on body image, self-esteem, and positivity. So, I’ve decided to start a Curvy Live Book Club (Oprah’s got nothing on me). Each month I’ll present the highlights of one of my favorite books. Feel free to join the discussion. And if you have a favorite book, let me know–I’d love to read it.

This month I’ve decided to feature Courtney Martin’s Perfect Girls, Starving Daughters. She has a compelling take on the pressure of perfection, particularly on women under 30; however, as a woman over 30, I find her insights to be spot on.

If you need a copy of the book, you can order directly from Amazon by clicking Perfect girls. Otherwise, the book is widely available at bookstores nation wide. I’ll give you a little background on the book tomorrow.

For fans of “The Full Body Project,” there is now a MySpace page (sanctioned by no less than Leonard Nimoy himself) for those who want to show some love for the book and art exhibit: myspace.com/fullbodyproject.

If you want to see some beautiful, dynamic women, just take a look at the friends pictures. There are some awesome ladies here.

Leonard Nimoy appeared on The Colbert Report Thursday night to talk about his latest art project, The Full Body Project a collection of photographs featuring plus size women. I just love Nimoy for his passionate advocacy of the beauty of female bodies at any size. And kudos to Colbert–he maintained his snarky character without being the least bit derogatory toward the woman in the photos.

If your not familiar with the exhibit and book, I did an extensive write up on the art collection in November, and a friend of The Curvy Life did a great guest blog on the project.

You can catch the replay tonight on The Colbert Report, or click here for a link to a video replay on The Colbert Report website.

I’m so glad to see the show featured on Oprah. There’s some great info on Oprah’s site. I’ve written two previous posts on the show. If you haven’t read them and are interested, here are the links:

Love Your Body Month Tip #9 (with video clip)

Feel Good Naked in 2008 (How to look good naked tips)

Two things strike me about the women featured on Oprah today:

1. The depth of the pain caused by negative body image.
2. The way we allow negative body image to limit living our lives.

Michael, a beautiful, intelligent woman, chooses to spend her free time in bed rather than actively engage in life with her husband and son. Body loathing is paralyzing and debilitating.

And Anita shows how the pain of negative messages can impact us for a lifetime.

Finally, I am always struck by how hair, makeup, and clothes can help a woman feel better about herself, even without clothes.

Here are some tips from the show on how to feel better about your body:

• Take baby steps.
• Live in the moment.
• Get rid of clothes that are too big or too small. “Keep the sizes that work for you and that fit for you, and then get rid of the other stuff,” Carson says. “Don’t mourn your old body.”
• Look at your whole body. “Don’t just focus on the bad stuff. If you have bad thighs, don’t automatically go there every day when you wake up and look at that,” he says. “Look at the good stuff, and reprogram your brain into thinking, ‘This is good. This is good. This isn’t so great. So what?’”

For more click here.

Love Your Body Month Tip #15:

Buy (insert favorite style here) lingerie.

I’m a fan of the lacy, racy stuff, but whatever your flavor–pretty, funky, comfy, silly–treat your body to something that makes you feel your best, most powerful self.

This is a great time of year for lingerie–post-Valentine’s should provide you with selection and sales. Check out our Shopping links for some great resources.

Enjoy!

Today, Valentine’s Day, is the 10th anniversary of V-Day, a day and an organization created to combating violence against women that developed from Eve Ensler’s play The Vagina Monologues. The V-Day organization has raised more than $50 million for local anti-violence groups and rape crisis centers.

Eve Ensler and Jane Fonda were interviewed twice today on the TODAY Show, and I appreciated this comment by Jane Fonda on the power of the play:

“I knew that women have a right to our humanity and bodily integrity. I didn’t always live it behind closed doors. But when I saw ‘The Vagina Monologues,’ I never laughed or cried so hard in the theater. I think it was while I was laughing that something happened and I kind of slipped into my body and I really changed.”

If we are fully in our bodies, fully appreciative of our bodies, we will not tolerant bad treatment of said bodies by others or by ourselves.

To celebrate the 10-year anniversary of V-Day, Ensler and company are staging the biggest production of “The Vagina Monologues” in its history. It will take place over two days at the New Orleans Arena and Louisiana Superdome on April 11-12, with a star-studded cast: Jane Fonda, Salma Hayek, Oprah Winfrey, Jessica Alba, Jennifer Hudson, Glenn Close, Julia Stiles, Ali Larter, Sally Field, Marisa Tomei, Calpernia Addams, Rosario Dawson, Kerry Washington, and musicians Common, Eve and Charmaine Neville.

Friend of The Curvy Life, Authentic Beauty, will be providing makeovers for up to 5000 of the women of New Orleans as part of V-Day’s “Superlove” event at the Superdome. The Curvy Life plans to be in New Orleans for the event–if you want to join us, see V-Day 1{0} for details.

I love Kathleen Turner as a fabulous curvy icon. She has been making the rounds with her new book, Send Yourself Roses:Thoughts on My Life, Love and Leading Roles. Give yourself a Valentine’s treat by watching her interview on the Today show (click here) or go and check out her book.

The following is our updated About page:

The Curvy Life blog is a response to the constant barrage of unrealistic images of women on television, in movies, and in print. We are constantly being told that our bodies and our lives aren’t “good enough” and many of us suffer from the emotional pain of feeling outside the beauty norm (ab-norm as it is).

However, the Curvy Life is really for her:

That’s me at age 15, hating my body.

I had already been on a diet or two, and I remember the punch in the gut I felt when I looked at this photo–I hated my thighs, I thought my stomach was too poochy, and my knees were too dimply. From this point forward, I made it a mission to avoid having my picture taken.

It breaks my heart to look at this picture today. I look at that photo know and think– How cute was I? Young, slim, with creamy skin, beautiful in the way of youth (and I wish I could have those thighs back). I was athletic and smart and outgoing. Yet, at this moment in my life, I felt like a failure as a woman (and I was just starting out).

It took me many years to learn to appreciate my own beauty, and dare I say it, to love my body. It was a process, and I want to share that process here, so that no woman has to carry the heavy burden on her heart carried by that 15 year-old girl.

Here I am, all grown-up:

I still wince at the site of myself on film, but I don’t run from the camera anymore. And I know, that one day, I’ll look back in wonder at the beauty of my youth here, just like I do with my 15-year-old self.

So, what’s the mission?

The Curvy Mission

1. To promote positive body image and self-esteem, regardless of size
2. To advocate for size inclusion and diverse images of women
3. To educate women about images and messages aimed at us
4. To promote body love rather than body hate
5. To encourage whole body, mind, and spirit wellness
6. To rage against the self-loathing machine
7. To create a community of support

I’d love to hear your curvy story. Feel free to share your curvy struggles, your curvy triumphs, your curvy fears, your curvy dreams–your curvy life.