I just saw Oprah’s latest weight loss show, “The Woman Who Lost 530 Pounds,” (11/28/2007) and I was particularly struck by two statements made by Bob Greene, Oprah’s diet/fitness expert.

Twice, Bob Greene said, “Women have to be perfect” to lose weight. The first time, he made the statement in relation to weight loss without an intense exercise program:

“If a woman is inactive, she has to be perfect with her eating. And who is perfect with their eating?”

The second time he used the expression, Greene was explaining why men seem to lose weight faster and easier than women (this quote is on Oprah.com):

“Bob explains that men tend to lose weight faster than women because of the hormonal advantage in the way testosterone acts on fat. ‘Women almost have to be perfect. A woman has to be active at least five to six days a week,’ he says. ‘Men can get away with three or four times a week and have even better results.’”

In no way was Greene trying to make viewers feel bad; he was trying to highlight how difficult it is to lose weight. However, I found the use of the word “perfect” to be jarring. Often, women torture themselves in an attempt to reach some notion of “perfect,” believing “I’ll be happy when I have… the perfect family, the perfect job, the perfect body, etc.

Later in the program, Greene himself commented on the danger of “I’ll be happy when…” thinking:

“If you start to [think], ‘Oh, I’ll be happy when I’m this weight,’ that’s when problems start because one of two outcomes: You never reach that weight and you’re not happy, or you reach that weight and realize it had nothing to do with your happiness.”

While I’m glad that he saw fit to mention that weight loss is not a cure for unhappiness (happiness must come from inside), I think that the message of the show was most certainly, “Lose weight, gain happy.” And to do so, as a woman,you must be “perfect,” never letting up on diet and exercise. Therefore, if you aren’t able to achieve your “perfect” weight, then it’s probably because you weren’t “perfect” enough to begin with. That’s a crushing pressure to bear.